So my friend ROBYN IS THE BESTEST FRIEND IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD! She is the winner of the Friendy’s this time and you’ll see why she’s so much better than ANY of the bitches reading this post right now. Honestly you’ll feel bad about yourselves and the way you’ve been my friend after reading and seeing all the wonderful things she’s done. She just stopped by, from Niagara Falls, to say hello and see how I was feeling and is now on her way back to Niagara Falls – she just stopped by for a half hour. That’s right BITCHES feel bad, feel really really bad about yourselves right now!
So this time, instead of a long list of reasons why I love this girl to pieces, I'm gonna show you what makes her so unique. Robyn has this terrific habit of making little cards for her friends when they've gone through a dramatic time (for engineers that means exams that went shittily) or when she thinks they're blue.
Here is every card she's ever made for me:
You'll be able to walk normal again
You'll be able to stop men from wearing pink
You'll be able to have any man you want (if you don't already...I wouldn't be surprised)
You'll be able to stand up to those "evil, tempting, beautiful" women that you have a hard time saying "NO" to, even though you don't really want to
You'll rule the world
You'll win the lottery and take me on a trip
You'll break that bad habit of snorting coke off a hooker's stomach
You'll be the most beautiful person ever....wait...you already are! :) awww muffin
You'll stop having kidney problems
You'll marry Donald Trump....ewwwwwwww
You'll finish reading this card and you'll LOVE it
I hope you feel better because you deserve better! :) *HEART* Roybn
-she wrote this for me after a good old fashioned bitch fest about a boy, stupid andrew *mumbling profanities*
On the inside of the card it says:
“Puppys, rainbows, nice weather, being out with your favourite person, Robyn, eating favourite food, hot guy, puppies, horses, vanilla smelling things, Robyn, Birkemoe, Bamboo, the movie Ever After, boyfriend, best friends…”
How did you get so tought?!? You win the award for toughest cookie ever! And the most gorgeous…tee hee.
I hope you feel better and your little guy doesn’t hurt too much. You’re a trooper!
(I wish I could take your potential pain)
With Love, Robyn
And on the back of the second card, because she knows how much I love crosswords:
-this was after my gut wrenching procedure with a stent and no anathesia, read ' So Long Stenty, We Hardly Knew Thee!' for all the drama.
Here’s what’s written (and drawn) on the inside:
I couldn’t think of anything to put on the cover, but then I caught you stroking the pole in front of you. I know it is a pleasing site, that wonderfully cast concrete column (even with the bug holes) but at least keep it private. I mean c’mon, you were practically drooling, with your mouth open like Jayla during one shoot.
So what do you think about the show now? Who’s going to win? This is of course, after I severely HURT Nicole…haha. I can see her getting better, but she’s not my style. EWWWWW
Lots of heart shape
-after some boredom in the beautiful Bahen Centre, getting a much needed tutorial before a final - MAYBE THIS IS WHY I FAIL?!
Here’s the fourth:
Well at lease your kidney will be going to things more usefullike:
Kidney-shaped pool design
ALL Chinese food
Handbags for celebrities
Etc etc etc
So, do not be sad. Your kidney had a greater purpose than you could have ever known. Now, you can be happy! You are such a good provider. J
-after learning that I would have to get my Kidney removed, she's so beautiful it's ridiculous!
The fifth card but hopefully not last :(
Starts off with “YAM….mmmmmm” (Yeah that confused me too)
Did you know that Peter Lassonde was a C- average student at U of T and now he is one of the most successful businessmen in Canada? He was the largest supply of diamonds, gold, nickel, copper, etc. He rules the world! And so can you. J I would worship you if you became King…for sure.
Hey Darek, my beauty.
I hope you have a wonderful day today. I know yesterday was a little tough, but I want you to know what things will be ok. Life has a funny way of working out. Besides, I think you are very smart and you should never think otherwise. Obviously my opinion means everything, so believe me! (I should be in the Bible…I’m that good) You’ll do great on Municipal; time to turn over a new leaf. Don’t let anything in the past bug you!
With a penguin on the back, because we all know Penguins are the ancient Chinese symbol of Nice-ness :)
We call what this girl as done, OVERTIME ladies and gents - she truly is the Queen of queens :)