Thursday, June 01, 2006

Aging: The Unstoppable Killer


So it's official, I'm getting old. I went to play tennis this weekend with my friend's Brennifer. Afterwards, we watched our friends play two games of baseball (they call themselves the SUPERFRIENDS) and to kill some time, me and Jen, and along with Bren began doing some long jumping.
I went home, feeling fine, not a care in the world, thinking "This is going to be the summer of fitness, of creating and keeping a healthy lifestyle - 'I'm gonna take up running' I exclaimed to my mother still high on Adrenaline.
Then the morning of Monday came...
I. couldn't. move.
But being the son of Polish immigrants, I could not deny my heritage and forced myself up and got to work. Bending, which is a MUST in the profession of box cutting/lifting, was not happening. Walking was a nightmare.
I had to give up. I clocked out at 10:35am, swallowing my pride and went to the doctors. Learned I had a tilted disc in my spine! WHAT IN HOLY HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!
First kidney problems, and now this?! Next I'll have to start wearing adult diapers and talking about yesteryear while smoking a pipe and sitting on my porch, leaning on my cane.
Luckily I got to skip two days of work (been working there a month and have YET to do a full week's work!) where I just took the happy drugs my doctor prescribed - Tylenol 3 and APO CYCLOBENZAPRINE. Taken alone, these little pills do nothing to me, but together their drug forces unite putting me in a mini-coma for hours on end. I'm currently fighting off the urge to sleep to write this up, so I better be making you bitches laugh...
Luckily, the tilted disc is nothing serious and should untilt itself soon. But yes, must start running, or power walking or SOMETHING to keep me active and preventing this "Aging" thing from taking place.
I need someone to push me to be active, call me up and ask if I would like to go for a run, or a swift power-walk or hell, just keep me from writing this blog...
Oh man, Gnarls Barkley when you're legally high, is kick ass!

3 comments:

Jamie said...

the cold clammy hand of death reaches for thee Darek....as it does for all who age.......

HOPE YA FEEL BETTER PUNKIN!

Jamie

Anonymous said...

"uh sir... i think i taste blood"

Anonymous said...

lol.... at least you didn't tear it! be very glad of that... I couldn't move for 2 weeks and couldn't sit down for 3 months, but now look at me!!!
You should take up pilates! tis quite fun :)