Riiiiight

I usually don't report on celebrity news (then again Ricky Martin and Clay Aiken aren't really celebrities anymore) but I just want the world to know when straight men have children through in vitro fertilization, with women who are not their wives but "friends", their coming-out stories are, at max, 12 months away. Stay tuned you gossip hounds!

Time To Say Goodbye

Saying goodbye is such hard thing to do. You say it when you want to end something, when you don’t want it to return, when you know you shouldn’t have it return to you. I was always fond of the saying “No, not a Goodbye but a See You Later” but this time it really is goodbye. For how long, I don’t know, hopefully for a while, if I have the willpower and courage, hopefully forever. But here it goes:

Goodbye Wendy’s Big Bacon Classic. You have no idea how hard this is for me to say, how much I truly love you, how much I am going to miss you. No don’t say it, for if you beg me to come back, I won’t have the willpower to say no. I really do LOVE you Big Bacon Classic and it’s because of this, that I have to let you go. You are such a tasty burger. Not a delicious burger. Not a great burger. These words are meaningless when said about you – you are tasty. You are the burger that I am always up for, that burger I could eat right after a Thanksgiving meal, that burger that makes me smile. That burger I wish I could buy in bulk, just rip open a bag of you, and pop one into my mouth. In Polish we have a word that best describes you – SMACZNY, pronounced Smah-Chne – just yummy. You will be sorely missed Big Bacon Classic.

From now on, I’m only going to be buying your healthier cousins – the salads, but know that while I eat my bowl of lettuce and cold pre-cubed chicken chunks, I will be thinking of you, always thinking of you.

Time and Ish

I think I’m part of a breed of human that’s bound to go extinct within the next 50 years. I’m punctual. Now I’m not rigid or anal or insane about keeping time but I’m on time. You want me some place at 4:00pm, I will be there at 4:00pm, not 4:15pm, not 4:30pm, not 3:45pm, not 5:00pm.

If I’m running late, you will know about it, through a phone call. At most I will be 10 minutes late without any warning to an event that has a start time with the words “around” or “ish” in it:
Hi People!
Come celebrate my 26th birthday with a potluck at my place!
I was thinking around 7ish? Cool? Hope to see you there!
Why? Because the host doesn’t care when his or her party will start and quite frankly, neither do I. I’m asked to show up, not show up on time.

My reasons for running late also stem from the fact that I’m a rare type of human being. I’m late due to outside influences I cannot control. Such influences include:

Traffic – an accident can happen whenever resulting in traffic that can become a COMPLETE CRAWL FOR LIFE. The second I hit this kind of traffic, I am on the phone to the party I am suppose to meet, informing of the snafu I’ve found myself in and will try and get to the destination as quickly as possible. What boggles my mind is that calling someone to inform them I will be late and I have no idea how late I’ll be but just keeping them up-to-date has deemed me “anal”. I like to think it would deem me “thoughtful”. But tomato, to-mah -to. (Tomato is the correct pronunciation everyoneJ)
This also includes any car-related problems, accidents, fender benders, and dead batteries.

Prior engagement – it happens, you offshoot how much time/fun you’re going to have at a prior engagement and want to stay longer or have to stay longer. Sometimes the engagement just runs longer than you or your host anticipated and you’re literally stuck. Sometimes a phone call cannot be placed (it may be rude to get up and go make a phone call during the prior engagement) but the second it’s over, a quick phone call explaining the circumstances is usually what I’ve been known to do. Typically the prior engagement holds more weight than the latter engagement and most people are reasonable in understanding what’s going on, it’s usually the family-party followed by the meeting up with friends-party.

Other people – when people cannot make up their minds about the plans for the evening but seem to want to hold control of the plans being made for that evening, this causes a backlog, a traffic jam if you will, to all other parties included and will cause them to be late:

What do you want to do tonight?
I dunno, we were thinking Buddies or a movie or maybe rock climbing or free interpretive dance lessons, I’ll get back to you.
Well I’m not really feeling clubbing and I’m sure *insert a few names* aren’t feeling it much either, why not *insert movie name that everyone can enjoy* I think it’s playing at 9:30 (note, I KNOW it’s playing at 9:30, because I’ve looked up movie times prior to calling other people) .
Um, I dunno, we’ll see, I’ll call you in a bit

Ahh, “a bit” the most safest, wonderfulest, awesomest two words in the English language for people to use. It’s so generic, so un-defined, so relative, you can never be wrong when you utter these two words. A bit to me is, at most, 5 minutes, you’re not calling your other friends to discuss the fragile state of Uganda, or how Phelps seems to be a two-face; ugly in one photo, not-so-ugly in another – you’re calling (or should be) to say “Darek and *insert a few names* aren’t really feeling Buddies, what about *insert movie*?” THAT is the only conversation you should be having because I am waiting, at home, doing nothing, for your call. I know I am sounding like the world revolves around me but believe me THIS is what I do when we reach a traffic jam in ideas on what to do for the evening. I don’t want my friends waiting around, when they could be getting ready and organizing rides (if need be) – it’s just, well, rude.

I guess that’s where it stems from. I find people that are chronically late having one or both of the following going on in their head:

1. Crazy egos, and I mean bigger than mine. The world can, well, wait for them.
2. Fear of rejection – maybe they are not arriving on time because they’re scared their friends will not be there and they will have to wait. When you’re late, you’re in control so to speak, you know real events won’t happen without you and you don’t run the risk of showing up somewhere alone (even if only a few minutes).

I have to admit anytime I have dear friends running late the first thought ALWAYS in my head is “they forgot me”. It’s never once happened, lord help the first person that does forget me, but I have to admit when I’m sitting in the living room because I’ve surfed all the websites I do while waiting for someone to come pick me up and have now gone to watching TV in the living room looking for something I can’t get too invested in, that thought of my friends, picking up everyone but me, is the only thing going through my head, until my phone vibrates with the “we’re outside” phone call of 2 seconds. Thank Jeebus for by-the-second billing.

There's Right & Wrong and Right & Left

I promised myself I wouldn’t give this man anymore attention than deserved. He’s like Paris Hilton or any bad jingle that gets stuck in your head. Ignore it and hopefully they will just vanish, forgotten instantly like a dream sometimes. But for some reason, I cannot stop reading his weekly column in the Sun, I just can’t. Like many liberals, I fall into nodding approvingly when another liberal writer writes something I agree with. But that’s where it ends. No discussion, no one playing devil’s advocate at the risk of offending someone, somewhere about something said.

So maybe that’s why, every Monday, during my break at work, I read his Saturday column. I see in him, the person I use to be. Catholic, devout, seeing life on the straight and narrow too scared to deviate even in the face of glaring contradictions to a faith that has been re-written countless times. And lately, after late night discussions with other like-minded liberal friends, I’ve been finding myself agreeing with some of his written work. No, I don’t want polygamy to even be considered as recognizable marriage in Canada; he doesn’t either but more because it’s a non-Christian value rather than a total abuse on the legal system that provides for those couples that are having a rough time making ends meat. But hey you know what they say about the enemy of my enemy.

Same-sex marriage has been legal in Canada for a few years now and so far the skies aren’t blackened, husbands aren’t suddenly switching teams leaving their wives, children aren’t coming out of the closet in record numbers dwindling the chance of our survival for the future. But that doesn’t matter; it’s not marriage because children can’t be made. It’s not right because there may be too many dangling bits or not enough dangling bits in the household. He doesn’t grasp that maybe this law allowed a father to see that there’s nothing wrong with his son, or prevented a young woman from entering into a loveless marriage because it’s expected of her to do so, in her small town.

But hey, it’s a difference of opinion. He and I, in my head at least, go back and forth, singing the “I was right, you were wrong; I’m going to sing the ‘I was right’ song” with no solution in the end. Abortion is wrong. Tell that to a 10 year old raped, impregnated and will forever hold the scars of her violation. Euthanasia is wrong. Tell that to a child, watching his parent die, slowly, painfully, without dignity, lying on a bed, having a nurse change their diaper. Homosexuality is wrong. Tell that to Matthew Shepard.

I guess as the nice, sweet-minded liberal that doesn’t want to offend anyone, I may have cringed at some of the stuff he’s written but I took it in stride. “It’s his opinion”, “He’s entitled to say whatever he wants, so long as he doesn’t break the law”, and “Who am I to tell him otherwise” – were all wonderful catch phrases that prevented any real conversation of his erroneous and offensive speech because hey, he’s not gone as far as to say his way is the only way, simply a way. Until now.

Read the following:
http://www.torontosun.com/News/Columnists/Coren_Michael/2008/03/22/5073661-sun.php

Now I could talk about how Jesus is simply a Sun-god myth, rewritten over and over, even worshipped by pagans under different names. Attis, Mythra, Dionysus and his Egyptian Twin Horus (the story of Jesus and the story of Horus are pretty much identical, from being born on Decemeber 25th, to a virgin, to sharing the name “Lamb of God”, to beginning a ministry at 30, dying on a cross by crucifixion, to entering the land of the dead and staying there for 3 days, to being resurrected on the 3rd day) are all demigod or god like beings sent by the Universal Father to bring the world salvation. I could be an ass and state just that. But he’ll scoff. Call me an atheist (as if it’s an insult). Perhaps, if I’m lucky, rebuke everything and write something about it and in the end he’ll truly believe (here’s the scary part) that because I’ve taken all of 10 minutes to write this, it’s simply more proof that he’s right in his belief and more importantly (read: frightening) that I’m wrong.

Stupidity is something I cannot condone. Be it a man that rides his motorcycle without a helmet because he can’t take off his turban and then tries to sue the government, after caught breaking the law, because his rights to stupidity (read: religious freedom) were in question with the Highway Traffic Control Act or be it a man that cannot even, in the smallest instance, try to understand that maybe there’s more to his religion, his country and it’s traditional background than the written word he writes. And the written Word he reads.

Go on believing you are right and I am wrong Mr. Coren – it finally gives me something more to do, than approvingly nod and hope I’m not offending anyone.

Happy Easter to all!

Oh Lordy...

http://www.thestar.com/News/Ontario/article/303897

Ugggggggggggggh. I don’t know where to begin. To summarize the article for those to lazy to read it in it’s entirety. Man drives motorcycle on the highway. Man is pulled over for not wearing a helmet and fined according to the laws of this province in the amount of $110. Man protests saying he can’t wear a helmet because he would have to take off his turban. Man goes to the Ontario Human Rights Commission saying his human rights were violated and he didn’t know he has to wear a helmet in Ontario because he didn’t have to in British Columbia, his former home. Man wins the ruling and doesn’t have to pay the fine.

Excuse me, what? Where do I begin? Maybe with how incredibly stupid the Man’s position is? Maybe with how incredibly stupid the Ontario Human Rights Commission is for even allowing to hear what this Man has to say? Maybe with utterly absurd the Man’s lawyer is? Here are some of the things the Man’s lawyer had to say about the ruling:

“Telling [the Man] to choose between his religion or participating in the normal life of Ontario is discrimination”

No, it’s called following the law dipshit. All citizens of this country and their respective provinces are expected to follow the respective laws. If the Man wants to wear his turban in everyday life, I will not stop him, hell, I will fight for his right to do just that, so long as he does not break any laws in doing so. Going to the store? Wear a turban. At your place of work? Wear a turban. Suddenly want to become a police officer? Wear a turban. Why? Because if you take away the turban from this examples, what’s changed? Nothing. Not a thing.

Not wearing a helmet whilst driving your motorcycle on a highway or any road is
a) dangerous b) stupid and c) illegal.

More of what the dipshit lawyer had to say:

"Roads and riding a motorcycle are something that is available to everybody in Ontario provided they wear a helmet. But that condition makes it impossible for [the Man] and everybody of the Sikh religion. That amounts to discrimination."

No that’s called a conflict. A personal conflict. A personal conflict about one’s personal religion. Here is the Man’s choice – wear a turban and run the risking of dying or getting a ticket or take off my turban and wear a helmet in accordance with the laws of one’s province (which by the way is the citizen’s right to determine, ignorance of the law is not an excuse to not follow the law!) and pay restitution to your religion in accordance to your religious laws, in the privacy of your own home or place of worship. The Man made his choice; he wore a turban instead of a helmet, got caught, and must give restitution for his crime albeit a misdemeanor.

Here’s something from the Man:

“In an affidavit entered in court, [the Man] said he had a "sincere" belief that he was obligated under the tenets of his faith to wear a turban at all times when outside his home.
‘We want an exemption for our religion,’ he said outside court.”

Here is what I would say to that:

*clears throat* “No.”

“But your honor, my client is being discrimat-“

“No. He’s not.”

“He has a right to practice his faith-“

“Agreed, but in doing so, he broke the law, a law designed to protect his life, the answer is No.”

My point? If you are in this country, you follow the laws of this country. Religion is a private matter. A completely private matter. The Man made his choice; he chose to follow his religion and took on the risk of being caught of breaking the law to follow his religion. He was caught. Your beef isn’t with the country and its “discriminatory” laws; it’s with your religion and it’s laws altering and keeping you from living the life you want to live.

ANTM: America's Next Top Meh

So how utterly dissappointed was I that Tootie I mean Saleisha won ANTM Cycle 9? In fact this past cycle and the one before it, were the worst EVER in ANTM history. Why? Well let's take a look at the winners from ANTM cycle 9:

Ugh, Saleisha. She may look cute and adorable in this photo...oh wait, she looks cute and adorable in every photo! There's no high-fashion here. There's nothing I can make fun of! Even when she's trying out her black-itude she's cute as a pixy!

Ugggggggggggggggggggggggggh! Jaslene or as she says her name "Jhas-Lin". She's the winner from ANTM 8 and this taco's burrito is just too spicy!! Too thin, too cleft-chinned, too guacomole! I felt sorry for her because a highlight of her career will be part of a runway show from some designer in China that couldn't get an actual audience, so he had to hire people to watch his clothing line.

Plus she has deaf-voice. "Eathy, breathy, boo-ti-fol cober gurl!"

I'm going to go thru all of Saleisha's boring ass adorable pictures and show you how STUPID modeling agencies are for wanting this as their representative. (My theory is that Tyra picks maybe 500 girls, bring them to the agency, the CEO or president or whatever says "I want this one" points to a girl and Tyra picks 12 other girls to make a very entertaining show.)

Photoshoot 1:

Yeah, ok, Saleisha looks pretty hot here. Crossed legged, kinda giving the goddess heather to her left the "hey girl" look. But why? Is it her fierce modelling ways? Nope. Two words - long hair.

Photoshoot 2:

She's upside down. Look at that. That's all I really have to say about this picture because a)I can see the harness and therefore it's nothing special and b) she looks like she's holding on to the rope.

Photoshoot 3:

She looks sick. Not sick as in fly or hot or "daaaaaamn" - like unhealthy, itchy and gross. She's suppose to be a tulip. She looks like a cross between an Ewok and a rash.

HERE is a good picture from this shoot:

Meet the smartest person ever on ANTM - Victoria. She's suppose to be a cactus and has the distinction of showing how stupid it is that Jay Manuel and Tyra take themselves seriously by uttering one of the best lines ever: "You're not being Baby's Breathe enough!" I love her. And her picture protrays what she is - she looks uncomfortably, prickly and the twist in her neck reminds me of the grooves you find in cacti. This was the photo that she got eliminated for.

Photoshoot 4:

Can anyone tell me why her va-gooch looks so big and well wide? All I think about is Mean Girls and "it's not my fault I have a wide-set vagina and a heavy flow!" and now because I've said THAT all I can think of is "My anus is bleeding!".

She's a "fashion-gargoyle" - do you suppose the people that come up with these shoots realize no one cares what the girls do, so long as they look hot, so they just smoke up all day and watch disney cartoons? Cuz I do...

Photoshoot 5:

Girl's a tire, ya'll. Yep a fucking tire. Now I can't blame the pixy for Tyra's stupidness and I have to admit she looks hot. But you could put virtually any background behind her and you would still notice the cute pixy in the tight skirt. There's nothing here relating her to her, albeit. stupid ass photoshoot.

She's still looks like Tootie!

Photoshoot 6:

Remember when you were young and when you had to go pee you'd grab your crotch, thinking this would hold in the pee?

I wonder why I'm suddenly reminded of this....

Photoshoot 7:
It's Moe from the 3 Stooges everyone! She doesn't look cute here but more like something is just off about her face. Like she was caught laughing? Or sneezing? I dunno, too much pixy dust will do that to you.

Also - a vest and a tank top? Really?...Really?

Photoshoot 8:

So apparently the theme for this photoshoot was being a "Chinese-Princess". She's black. Nuff said.

But wait! Before I'm called a racist - a new hilarious colleague of mine made the great point of asking "What in the fuck is a Chinese Princess anyway?! They had their feet bound and were sold once they started menstrating - nothing regal about that!" Excellent point! But if I were to think of a Chinese Princess, I would think someone covered up, demure, shy but sexy as hell, I would think of:

Heather. Oh look at that. She's covered up (for the most part). She's very shyly sticking out her leg and in a very seductive stance. And I can totally see in my mind her walking down these stairs as the entire court just gasps at her beauty. Which is the image one would want when thinking of a Chinese Princess!

This is the photo she got eliminated for.

Photoshoot 9:

I think the theme for this photoshoot was to be a chief warrior trying to scale the Great Wall of China. I see a girl, bouncing, and she's gonna smash into the wall. I also see a girl that has the cartoon remedy for a tooth-ache around her face. And she looks stumpy.

The thing that bothered me about this photo is that the judges LOOOOOOVED it. Some saying it was the best in the history of ANTM - REALLY?!

Best in the history of ANTM? This?! But not say,

this one:

Kahlen as the Sin of Wrath.

Or this one:

Britney as some sexy-ass candy!

Or this one:

Victoria as part of her anti-smoking campaign (look at the reflection in the mirror).

With Tyra telling me THAT photo of Tootie was the best ever - I felt like I was in George Orwell's 1984 and soon Big Brother aka Tyra was going to tell me that 2+2 is sometimes 5 if she sees fit for it to be 5!!

Photoshoot 10:

Again she's adorable. And you know what? That's perfectly fine. She's selling (or trying to) fruit flavoured lip gloss to little girls. You want someone cute for that. And it's completely fine that she's commerical. But when you try to make a commercial model a high fashion model - you get a cute girl with a toof-ache trying to conquer the Mongols. There is no such thing as a Top Model - and I thank you Saleisha for pointing this out!

RIP Miss Piggy

RIP Miss Piggy

July 2005-August 2007

You are going to be missed

And Back!

So it's been 3 months since I've put something up here and I figure I should try something controversial. Skepticism. I know, I know - you're all gasping and shocked that I would try something this controversial, but hey, that's how I do.

I've been given the cute little nickname by my friends of "Actually" - because I always point out flaws in stories/facts people use/urban legends people believe. I can't help it, I really can't. If something is inaccurate, I'd want someone to correct me (despite the stubborn bitch I am) so I don't sound unintelligent in front of others.

I think it started waaaay back in high school when my brother saw me reading a bunch of "facts" that are sent through chain letters on the interweb. You must've gotten them:

"A duck's quack doesn't echo and no one knows why"

"Kentucky Fried Chicken became KFC because it uses mutated/incest chickens that legally aren't chickens anymore"

"Humans only use 10% of their brains"

And so on and so forth. My brother saw these and asked the simple question of "Why don't you look up useFUL facts?" And so it began. I became interested in what was truly believed by credited professionals and not the crap floating around on the internet. And if something really interests me, then it's in my head. Permanently. (A ducks quack does echo, it's just the way the quack sounds that covers up it's own echo/Kentucky Fried Chicken became KFC so that people wouldn't be turned off the product by the word "Fried"/Humans use 100% of their brains, just not 100% of the time)

So I would correct people that started with these urban legends and such. Most people took it swimmingly "Oh cool, I knew something was fishy about that story" was the general response. And then I began to question stories about ghosts/supernatural experiences and such. Until I made the grand affirmation: I don't believe in ghosts.

I'm not an atheist (I don't understand how an atheist can believe in ghosts, maybe someone can help me understand that). I do believe in God and the existence of the soul. But I don't believe the things that occur on Earth, matter in the grand scheme of things. I always found the belief in ghosts so very "centric" - something happened to someone, so therefore something needs to remain of that someone. One person out of 6 billion is practically nothing (mathematically speaking).

So that's why I don't believe in ghost stories. They're too "perfect" every other possibility is null and void leading the listener to only believe ONE and only ONE truth - that a ghost exists. I quietly hide my smirks whenever someone speaks of Ouiji Boards and shield them from my rolling eyes; call me a skeptic but I just can't believe that the makers of Monopoly have created a communication device with the dead.

I remember once my friend was telling me of a story about how he and a group of friends were doing the Ouiji Board at someone's house and asked the ghost what the number on the house was and it pointed to the number of the house. So I stated "well you guys knew the number on the house, when you pulled up there", my friend replied "most of us just followed one or two people, and it was dark, so no one saw the number" to which I rebutted "all it takes is one person to just nudge it [the curser] in the direction you want it to go to" to which my friend said "Noooooo, no one was moving the curser" to which I replied "But the owner of the house knows his own number" and at that point I could tell my friend was getting a little miffed, so I let it go. But there's always something to counteract the logical reasoning behind a ghost story - it was dark, no one knew the number, it moved on it's own, it was a new house so the owner wasn't accustomed to seeing his new house number - ALWAYS something to lead you to the only conclusion that 1) it was the supernatural and 2) fear it.

I think psychics are the smartest people in the world - EVERYONE is scared of death and the uncertainty of the future and what will happen to those they love. You will ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS have people coming to you wanting to make sure someone is ok. I would love to just go up to a psychic and say "Alright, go". Not give them my name, nor my age, or sign, not anything that they can make a generic reference to (let's face it, most people in the same age bracket are experiencing at least SOME of the same things).

I most certainly don't believe in Astrology. Your birthdate is a fluke. 9 months is the generic range. Someone women give birth early, others give birth late; it's genetics that determine when your mom is ready to pop you out, not the alignment of the stars. After you're born, then it's all exact according to your sign OR defined by some range. Jamie gave me a card reading once and said I would live anywhere from 1-2 years, 10-20 years or 100-200 years from the time of the reading. I'm not saying it wasn't fun or nifty to have my best friend give me a reading, I'm just saying for something that is already determined, it should be read like a book no? I shouldn't have a psychic tell me they are getting "someone that starts with a D" (if you were a ghost would you tell someone that can see you "tell my son, my name begins with a D"?)

I do believe in Alien races - if Earth is one of trillions upon trillions of planets that evolved life, I'm fairly certain it occurred again, somewhere else. Have they visited us? I highly doubt it; I look at the Earth as more of a Brampton of the Universe, the things worth visiting are few and far between so why travel so far for cheaper merchandise and a terribly planned piece of land?

I guess I'll always been that one guy that just bursts people's bubble; I've come to accept that nothing really magical happens here, so it's no wonder stories are created to spice things up. Then again I'll probably be the first to die once a ghost serial killer starts terrorizing my friends.

My Beliefs

So a new blog already for Darek? This means that it's crunch time at school and he's slacking - well more I'm semi-sleep deprived and just finished writing 5 chapters of my thesis in 3 days!

I recently took a quiz to determine what faith I most align myself with and according to this quiz I, with a rating of 100%, am a Secular Humanist.

Let's see what are some of the fundamentals of Secular Humanism and if that really portrays my belief structure:

•Belief in Deity: Not considered important. Most Humanists are atheists or agnostics

- Darek believes in God. Darek believes worshipping God is not what God wants because God doesn't want anything

•Incarnations: Same as above.

-I guess you can say Darek believes in reincarnation but more on that issue later

•Origin of Universe and Life:The scientific method is most respected as the means for revealing the mysteries of the origins of the universe and life.

-Of the physical universe and life, yes. I still believe in a spiritual aspect.

•After Death: An afterlife or spiritual existence after death is not recognized.

-Not in terms of heaven and hell - just existing after we die and either coming back or just staying where we came from.

•Why Evil? No concept of “evil.” Reasons for wrongdoing are explored through scientific methods, e.g. through study of sociology, psychology, criminology.

-Evil is subjective so no true definition of it exists <- that's all Darek belief ya'll

•Salvation: No concept of afterlife or spiritual liberation or salvation. Realizing ones personal potential and working for the betterment of humanity through ethical consciousness and social works are considered paramount, but from a naturalistic rather than supernatural standpoint.

-Salvation doesn't exist - there's nothing to be saved from.

•Undeserved Suffering: No spiritual reasons but rather a matter of human vulnerability to misfortune, illness, and victimization.

-Again because evil is subjective, suffering under a subjective evil is subjective as well.

•Contemporary Issues: The American Humanist Association endorses elective abortion. Other contemporary views include working for equality for homosexuals, gender equality, a secular approach to divorce and remarriage, working to end poverty, promoting peace and nonviolence, and environmental protection.

-Yep, yep, yep on all counts.

So not too much in common with secular humanism except for that last tidbit. I guess my belief structure comes down to the notion that God cannot be personified. Using words like God, Goddess, He, Her, Him, Jesus, Vishu - names in general just make it that much harder to trying to understand what God is.

For me, God is the very essence of existence. We are all from this before we are born, we choose a path in life we wish to follow (being part of God requires that you know all outcomes of life and all knowledge of everything - logically the only thing you cannot know is the existence of not knowing everything) follow that life (whether it's to become a single mother, a scientist, a flea, a president, a war criminal, a murderer, a pedophile, a teacher, an engineer, a paraplegic, a cow, a mad cow, a trekkie, or a model) until it is over and then we reunite to what it was that we left.

I have no clue why I am writing this or who for but it's the best way I can think of real answers to the real questions I've asked myself. I've never been one to take a side 100% (I may be stubborn as hell, but I'm usually proven wrong, learn something and move on). Yes I was a strict Roman Catholic at one point in my life, but I never completely agreed with the Church. Many times I just wanted to be like Douglas Adams and make a defiant statement that "NO, God does not exist" - but saying that just never felt right to me. I don't think I'm suppose to be an atheist with the life I'm living now.

Here's the link for the test: http://www.selectsmart.com/PRO/beliefnet/index1.html take it and tell me where you belief structure most aligns with. I'm curious to see whose what.

Oh Waiter...

I am a tipper. That doesn't mean I am a great tipper. I tip accordingly and with what I feel is respectful for the service I've received. This usually means I tip anywhere from 10-20%, sometimes because the service is deplorable and sometimes because I don't have a lot of cash on me.

What I don't understand is when people treat waiters with disrespect. I really don't think people understand that for the entire time of their meal (at a restaurant or fast food joint) a patron will only see their meal for 50% of the time. So if you're at a restaurant for 1.5 hours - you're only enjoying and seeing your food for less than 45 minutes (unless your Jen C, in which case you're eating for a few hours).

So it just boggles my mind when someone gives a waiter attitude - it's not their fault that something is not on the menu (go some place that is) or if a change in a side order comes with a $1.99 charge (that's the chain's/restaurant's policy) or if a substitute cannot be made (some restaurants don't carry certain types of wine) - so it makes no sense when someone cusses off a waiter, writes a snide remark on a credit card receipt or a flat out "no!" when their meal is about to be placed onto a table and is shoved away by said patron (yes I have heard of this occurring people). The things that can be done to your food when you're not looking at it and you would not have any idea of it being done are numerous.

So to ensure that YOU don't act like an asshole (unintentionally) and that your food arrives as quickly and delicious as possible here some nifty tips and rules of thumb to go by:

Tipping:

1. Your meal arrives but it's all wrong, here you can ask to have it sent back (politely) and are not obligated to tip terrifically (here you can get away from the 10-15% range).

2. Your meal arrives and the side order is wrong (me personally, I bite the bullet and eat, because well, I'm hungry) but if you were really, really craving that salad/soup/fries then enjoy your entree and send back the side. Again, if the service is perfection except for this little snafu, I think a tip of about 15% is still required.

3. You are seated and within 5 minutes a server has introduced his/herself and gotten the drink order down. Comes back with the drinks, asks if the partrons are ready to order (takes down order if they are) or comes back in 10 minutes and then takes down order, in 20 minutes the meals have arrived, drinks are refreshened and server makes sure the meals are correct. Server comes back in 10 more minutes, refreshes drinks, asks if everything is alrite and is not seen again until the plates are cleared and the bill is brought. +15% is required and expected.

Attitude:

1. Server does the squat. This isn't gameplay, you're not my best friend and you're pretending to be friendly. So just expect some people to be a little put off by that. However, if case THREE occurs (from Tipping) again, tip accordingly.

2. Server asks inappropiate questions - "Do I look fat in this uniform?" "My boyfriend just broke up with me" - are things patrons don't need to know about nor are they expected to answer. Questions like this may result in lower tips...

3. Server comes, takes drink order, comes back, gives the patrons a few more minutes, 20 minutes pass by, then comes back, takes order, order comes back wrong, makes no apologies, doesn't freshen drinks (big pet peeve is having to ask another waiter to get refills) and only returns when the bill is dropped down - server gets and is expected to receive a tip of less than 10%.

Meals:

1. Meal arrives and it's perfect - tip at least 15%

2. Meal arrives with one little minor mistake - tip in the 15% range (-+2%)

3. Meal arrives completely NOT what you ordered (you wanted vegetarian pasta and you get pork wrapped in beef) and the service was slow and rude. Expect a tip of next to nothing - personally I would round up to the nearest dollar. If the behaviour was something that was exceptionally rude - I would even talk to the manager.

Well I think that covers it, so I hope I have enriched your lives and given some reliable tips to a better meal.

Pork wrapped in beef!

Take That You Hosers!

I just found this clip on youtube and I'm utterly disgusted:


And I'm not disgusted because some white-bred bitch with blond hair puts herself up on a pedestal and uses a derogatory term for an entire minority group at something that would be considered, at the very least, a "professional" conference.

What I'm angry and disgusted with is the applause she gets in the end. Ann Coulter is a dumb bitch. I really don't think anyone can dispute this fact. With this little conference she has gone from ultra right-winger to conservative fanatic; she's right up there with Pat Robertson now and will soon begin loosing respect across the board.

She is now a certified bigot. Even the most die-hard conservatives I've met all have one thing in common - you don't trump on human rights. Go back 50 years, replace "faggot" with "nigger" and you'd have the exact same response. A bunch of white people thinking they are better than another minority group and feeling they can laugh it up at their expense.

But things change, no one would be able to get away with a statement like that if it focused on a visible minority group. I may be angry and disgusted by the applause she received because the audience is just fucked up as her, but the one thing I won't be is scared. Fear is what conservatives want, it's what put people in the back of the bus and it's what prevents 10 or 11 year old boys from telling their parents, casually, over dinner, that they really, really like the boy next door.

Which brings me to my next point - same-sex marriage. The most recent article about it that I've found at
http://www.thecarpetbaggerreport.com/archives/9844.html and the jist of it is that the Washington Supreme Court voted against allowing same-sex marriage because according to them, marriage is for procreational purposes and defending traditional marriage ensures families will be made. Now a new law is coming up for debate that says married couples MUST have a child within 3 years of marriage or their marriages will be annulled.

I'm surprised that there isn't outrage against this bill. And I think I may have figured out why...

Try listing as many reasons, for a straight couple, to be against this bill:

"When and if me and my spouse decide to have children is none of the government's business!"

"The government has no right to interfere with the way my spouse and I wish to run our lives!"

"We want to be married, we don't want to have children"

Interesting how these reasons can be said by man or women, gay or straight couple, no? If straight conservative couples deplore this bill, they are inadvertently supporting the exact same rights of same-sex couples. Now I am scared. It'll be interesting to see how this all ends - will straight people allow a bill to pass that will control their lives just so they don't have to open their minds a tinsy weensy bit and understand the troubles faced by gay couples? Or will people smarten up and see that when the government comes into your bedroom, it ain't looking for a threesome?

I Don't Get It

Holy Moly I haven't put up a post in such a long time. But I have an hour to kill before my urbanization class and decided this is better than listening to music or reading my book.

Recently I went to see a play staring the Devine Miss Jennifer 'Bella' White in "7 Deadly Monsters". Miss White was a phenom but I walked out of the play with

<- this look on my face.

I didn't get it...I got small bits and pieces. I laughed at the funny parts and enjoyed the subtle humor. But in the end, I didn't get a real understanding of what was going on. Jamie got it. He was able to explain to me. Him and Bella joked about how where Jamie understood that "Monster" meant the emotions we hate but can't live without I was thinking about how I could build something to save the people from the monsters.

While walking around York U, Jamie was skipping down Nostalgia Lane remembering his times in Drama class where he hilariously changed a military macho man scene into two fags gabby about the high school dreamboat. Fucking brillance! I could tell that Jamie was feeling not so much blue but more that he wished he had taken one or two more drama classes.

My response to him wishing he had done more while in school - "So take a drama course at a community college" Jamie gave the response we all do when told we should do more school (especially when it's not needed) "Yeah I could" which mean he wouldn't and then I concluded with "And that's that. This closes the chapter in Jamie's life according to the black and white book of Darek."

I've always found this is the case in these kinds of situations all of my life - when there's a choice between logic/pragmaticism and artistic expression/understanding, I choose logic . Where some people excel in English or Literature - I don't. I got math, I got chemistry, I got physics. I can write and read. I can identify imagery in a book - hell even respect it if it's incredibly well written. But put me in a room where the term "Monster" doesn't mean "Monster" and it's all over.

In OAC English, one of the 6 books we had to read in the term was "Stone Angel" by Margaret Lawerence. One of the worst books I have ever read in my life. Where Aldous Huxley's Brave New World was something I simply didn't enjoy and forced myself to read in 3 days to "get it out of the way" - Stone Angel was a complete and total snore.

I will always remember one defining scene in my life in class where my teacher Mr. Bonnah wanted us to discuss one scene in the book. The scene was when the main character, Hagar, an elderly lady upset at the world, farts in her chair, mentions she's farted and goes off on this diatribe about how shitty her life is.

So all the more artistic-inclined people in my little group discussed how she farted was a symbol because "society" had turned it's back on her and the farting act "symbolizes" that Hagar is a symbol of how the world doesn't care for it's elderly.

I said "She's led a long life, had children, has grandchildren - she's earn the right to fart in public and not give two shits what the world thinks" - my group didn't agree, we went with the "artistic" expression in the main class discussion and my teacher nodded in approval. I'm sure they were right - I just hate knowing that for some reason their interpretation is more "right" than mine.

I may not be the best engineering student or have that much respect for the profession; Hell I'm writing a novel myself and love to read. But I like the right/wrong answer approach. I hate that people think I'm going to be a snob when they tell me what their major is after learning I'm in Civil Engineering. I may not get how someone can fail "The History of Basket Weaving" but hell if studying The Psychology of Russian Literature and it's Progression into the Ukranian Psyche floats your boat, float on!

Just don't assume because I look for a solution to a problem as opposed to trying to understand why a solution is needed or if the problem is really a problem and the real problem is people thinking something is a problem in the first place that I can't be artistic, appreciate a good piece of music and snap with all the hipster cool hipsters at a gothic poetry reading.

Well There's Your Answer Fish-Bulb

So I get a lot of slack for the fact that I look like I'm 12. Also for the fact that my metabolism is the greatest/worst thing on the planet, trapping me forever in the body of a 16 year old girl; a 16 year old girl that can eat fast food on average twice a week without any exercise!!

But aside from my body, I have a face that can contort into some pretty weird shapes as seen here <-- And because of the fact that I'm a chameleon, I've had my dear friends inform me that I look like a variety of cartoon characters, so much so, that I dressed up as one for halloween. I know I'm just giving fodder to Brendan and Jamie for more jokes that will leave me in tears in the dead of night, wishing that people would just LIKE ME!!!! I mean, oh you guys, so crazy funny!

First off caillou, which I only resemble when I have my shaved head. I think it was Sam that pointed this out, at a picnic, where I arrived wearing a yellow tee-shirt and blue shorts.

I laughed with all my other friends at how funny Sam was for her observation.

But on the inside I was shattered.

I usually only look like Doug in the early summer season, when the tan as faded long away and I've shaved my head for the summer.

So let's see, nifty red running shoes, tiny little dog that is basically an animal version of himself and whiter than snow...

Hi Brendan!!

And speaking of Brendan, he was the one that made this connection.

I'm Hermie...a fucking dentist elf...

But enough for me to dress like him for Halloween...

Damn hat took nearly 4 hours to make and damn mother finished it off in 2 minutes... *continues grumbling*

And last but not least, after catching an oldie but a goodie of the Simpsons, I noticed very much, that WHEN I win the lottery, I will be Richie Rich.

I mean, he even has the part in his hair...

And dimples...

What a Day

I'm going to tell you about how I spent December 30th, starting at 12 AM. Why? I have no clue, but I've never wanted to write in my lil bloggy more than right now and it's hard to resist the urge.

So where was I at 12AM? I was at Gabi's shooter party in the E-dot, getting shot at by grandma's, because we all know Etobicoke and Mississauga are soooooooo different, right Jen?

Anyways, had a blast with Gabi, Heather, Andrea, Melinda, Felicia, Rian, Joy, Jen C (who you callin' bitch, bitch?!) and and and...damn it, I thought I had this time - oh wells, better luck next time, right ladies :)

So after my screw driver and few shots at Gabi's, I took it slow cause I was driving and by 3 we were ready to go, Jen was "presentable" and offering me sex to bring her to a McDonalds while Brendan told me he approved of Travis and feels he's "good for me" and "special". Oh drunk talk, sweet sweet drunk talk. Side note - I LOVE drunk Brendan, he needs to come out more.

"You don't say it enough" he says to me, in a whisper. And no, Jamie does not think you're gay. FUCK!

So, waiting in the drive through line at McDonalds was fun, in front of me was the van full of uggie club girls, that didn't move, even after they ordered, because they were waiting for their friend to come back from the gas station, peeing. Like she's not gonna be able to find you...

And behind me, a car full of "bad ass" flip guys (Conrad??) shouting and hollering at the car full of girls behind them.

After being told that Mickies didnt have beef or fish and only had junior chicken sandwiches - correction ONE junior chicken sandwich - we settled on that and were on our way home.

Didn't fall asleep til about 4:33 AM, that was the last time I remember seeing before falling asleep. Woke up at 10:00 AM to pee and then again at 11:30 AM - I was done sleeping apparently. Not feeling the greatest and trying to find the words to tell Travis that I really don't want to go clubbing but conflicted because I wanted to see my man; I decided I would clean the bathroom and wait for his call.

I decide to go clubbing, seeing Travis is more important than knowing the crap ass time I'll probably have a straight club (yeah breasts! I know man, did you see her ass? Mmmmmm love the smell of vadge!) Then my dear aunt Marisha comes over! I don't see her that often (she lives in Poland and is the only relative that calls me Dariusz) and she brings her daughter, my cousin, Basia (Ba-sha or Barbara for you whiteys and bleached peoples) and Basia's son, Lukasz, pictured below:

My new nephew everyone! I didn't know about this one! Now I really think my dear grandmother is a little worried about the Sobik family name. I'm most likely not having babies, Daniel I don't see being a father and if he is, he's going down the path of being one of those father that hires nannies and names his children Pashmina and Madison. I mean he just got a blackberry everyone...

Out of my four nephews (on my dad's side) Adrien, Oskar, Alex and Matthew, only little Matthew has the Sobik name.

It's weird, my dad's side of the family is just good at producing male children - I have 3 female cousins, 0 sisters, but have 2 brothers and 4 male cousins plus myself. And now the second generation is going strong at 4 males to 1 female (little Julianna)

So little Lukasz really really really likes Miss Piggy, brave little guy opened up her cage and went right for her, picked her up and petted her. Squeezed her a little too hard but got the hang of being gentle none the less. Well seeing as this was the first time I was meeting Little Lukasz, I had to cancel on Travis; damn bittersweetness.

So after the rarely seen part of my family up and left, I decided it was time to watch some tv, read some American Gods, and download some Whitney Houston. Just then, my mom comes in, a little tipsy, a rarity for this woman and I download her some Bette Midler (her favourite singer next to Shania Twain) and Shania Twain. I make her listen to Dolly Parton and some Nancy Sinatra. Once again, at 1 in the mourning, me and my mom were listening to music while she was a little tipsy.

I took a shower but before that the best thing to start off the New Year happened! For the past year I've had the biggest zit on my forehead. It's weird, I tried popping it before, and I think in doing so, I cut myself, which caused new skin to grow OVER the zit, making it utterly unpoppable. UNTIL TONIGHT! For some reason, something caught my eye as I was looking at myself in the mirror just before my shower. The unpoppable looking pasty and as I grabbed some toliet paper and wrapped my fingers, I popped with all my might - SUCCESS! It's gone!

Well this only meant that this Year will be the best yet! As I was finishing up my shower, I noticed a spider in the shower, I think it's the same one that I've seen these past couple of days. Instead of pulling a Jamie and killing it with a rage that burns hotter than that of thousand suns, I just smiled at my little guardian and towelled off.

What a day!

Favourite (parts of) Songs!

At a risk of copying Jamie (you just had to put TWO posts about music up, didn't you? I thought, I'll just wait for your next post, you can't accuse me of copying you then...and then you go and copy yourself, just tacky!), I wanted to share with the world a little gift, that might bring some good ole tears of joy to your eyeballs.

I realized that my music tastes don't really define any one particular genre, if it sounds good, I listen to it. Travis' best friend Jim, asked me, during his night long interrogation of me, what kind of music I enjoyed - I told him "mostly alternative, but I like rock and dance too". And it got me thinking - I likes particular parts of songs, I find it particularly hard to find an entire song I enjoy.

So here is a list of songs I adore and specifically time framed parts that I suggest you all download and listen to and cry and stare into the distance and whisper to yourselves "wow Darek is the very definition of brillance" and then hold your hand up, then close it and draw it close to your chest while closing your eyes and nodding up and down slowly...

Colorblind by Counting Crows:

Surprise Surprise - a little bias because it's my favourite song BUT listen to the very middle of the song (while listening to the first half of course) at exactly 1:41. It's a little tricky to catch the point I love but it's right at the end of 1:41 and right at the beginning of 1:42. It's just a slight pause but it's done right in the middle of the song - so it takes your breath away when you think the song is over but it just begins again.

O Holy Night by Celine Dion:

If you dont shed tears at exactly 3 minutes and 15 seconds into the song when Celine sings "Christ is the Lord" you have no soul, period. Those four words last from 3:15 -3:25, the word "Lord" takes her three seconds to sing from 3:22-2:25 and it's the best part of the song, hands down.

Mad World by Gary Jules:

Yes it's the theme song from Donnie Darko - which is a good movie and all "hipster cool" - but it is such a mellow and sad song. With lyrics like "I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had" and "Children waiting for the day they feel good, happy birthday happy birthday" so very sad; but beautiful none the less. But listen to the song once and then listen to it again and only this way you can see why I love the part at exactly 1:27 into the song. You think the song is just about to end (knowing you've heard it before) and when it doesn't it's a mixture of happiness (because the song is not over) and a mixture of sadness (because the song is not over).

Stairway to Heaven by Dolly Parton:

I've only heard the define Miss P's variation of this song and quite frankly that's enough - it's beautiful. Again, I may be a little bias because Dolly is one of the few entertainers that deserves her gay icon status, she supports same-sex marriage, gay rights, the whole nine yards and yet she's a devout christian; a perfect example of the word "christian" in my opinion. The song is long at 6 minutes and 31 seconds, but every second is worth it - listen in at exactly 5:06 and the wonder of this part of the song isn't over until 5:27; listen carefully at 5:22-5:27 to "Wanna be a rock and not a roll" and if you don't get what I mean, then I truly pity you. The first time I heard that part it literally took my breathe away - I stopped writing my lab for geomechanics and just sat and listened to the rest of her beautiful rendition of this historic song.

Into Your Hideout by Pilate:

Brendan introduced me to this song and I thank God he did. This song makes me want to drive faster when I hear it on the radio; it makes me want to run faster when I'm jogging; it makes me want to cry harder when I'm crying while listening to it. It just brings out everything you need out that you've pushed in and provides you with a solice you get only when you were a child and received reconciliation at church. Listen carefully at 2:30 - again it's one of those things where it's at the end of 2:30 and the beginning of 2:31 and it just brings you back into the song; brings you back to whatever it is you need to face.

It's Still Too Late by Evermore:

Heard this song at Jamie's and loved it instantly; it's very Pilate-y but not so charged up, to me this is just a nice song to listen to. The main singer's vocals are wicked, the way he says "Hessitate" right at the beginning of the song (end of 0:29 beginning of 0:30) just puts a clever little smile on my face. The all time best part of this song is at 3:13-3:14 - I have no clue what he's saying here but I all I know is I find that clever little smile on my face after hearing it.

Get Together by Madonna:

This song didn't get that much radio time or club time but I think it's her best hit off her newest CD. And oddly enough it's only the beginning and end parts of this song I love the best - the very first words outta her mouth are "Down, down, down in your heart, I find, find, find the secret, turn turn turn your head around, baby we can do it, we can do it all right" and the end "If it's better at the start, then it's sweeter in the end" - I always hear the word "better" as "bitter" and sing it that way when I hear it.

Hope you're all looking off into the distance now and understanding the wonder that is *whispers* Darek...

And the Competition Comes to a Close (sorta)...

So a couple months ago, me and my dear friend Robyn got into a little contract about America's Next Top Model Cycle 7, we each picked 6 girls and the one remaining was given to our dear friend Carolyn...

Well the finale is almost upon us, so I thought I'd go back and pick out those few pictures (because these photo shoots have been truly heinous and dull) that stood out and were actually superb. Enjoy!

Ladies and gentlemen I give you this cycle's "Girl Who Got Mad-Shafted". Megan was fucking PERFECTION, except for one flaw, she's 23. But this picture was so damn good. The over-exaggeration of divadom (is there such a thing?) is perfect here, the body language, the look on her face, the stupid little mut of a dog - all very perfect.
Megan, maybe it was better this way, I mean you avoided the Tyra speech of:
"Megan, in this industry your looks are everything and even though air-brushing will ALWAYS be around and even though models that are 40+ are still doing work and looking like they're in their 20's, that only comes with experience!"

I know, I know, I'm agreeing with the judges - but this is a fabulous photo! It's very "editorial" (still dont really know what that means, but can you tell that? nope!) and has almost an artistic side to it. I mean it does address the issue of bulimia nervosa and it's actually shocking.
.
.
.
.
Kay, I'm gonna be a HUGE prick here but...don't bulimics usually throw up into a toliet?
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, that's the "actually" speaking, not Darek!

This picture is just funny. It's so typical "Dumb Blond" it's ridiculous! But I love it! Here legs go on forever, end bent and hidden behind a hug book, the big hair, the doe-y eyes and look of pseudo-concentration but just looking really pretty - I FUCKING LOVE YOU CARIDEE!!!!! - I'm sorry, I'm sorry, that was the passion talking...
But a phenomenonal start to say the least!


Then... Alot of stuff didn't happen, really, all the photo shoots were pretty dull and boring, until Tyra came to save the day... and I feel sick for actually saying that...

We'll start with my least favourites - it's not so much scary as it is "You know that feeling when you wake up in a bus station with a condom in your ear?!"

One eye looks sorta normal and the other looks like she got cut in a fight over who gets to own here at the Women's Correctional Facility...


Not bad for a Sara Rue look-a-like but still nothing great. I mean now she's sporting Lebanese sideburns and her neck has minor fat-rolls - THAT'S why she's scary.



Eugena looks more confused than scary. Here's something that'll make this picture that much more scary, thanks to Travis:

Everyone, look in a little closer at the picture, now imagine Eugena saying this, in a whispy, almost molestery voice:

"Hi, my name is Eugena, I'm hear to WAAAASSSHHHH yo' vagina"

Fucking terrifying no?!?!?!

It's not so much scary but what I see when I see this pic is one of two possible outcomes - Anchal's either done something or is about to do something. It's that raised eyebrow, I'm sucker for them, it's my weakness I know, this picture looks more devious than scary...

Also it looks like she has one ear, what the fuck?! THAT'S scary!


Now we all know how much I hate trannies - MAKE UP YOUR MINDS! - but I learned to love Jaeda, once she got her hair cut, she actually looked like a model.

And this picture is just ripe with versatility

why you may ask

if Jaeda can look this good while looking so bad and still look like this
...
..
.

You found yourself America's Next Top Model - DONT GROW YOUR HAIR OUT!



Damn you Mel-Ho, this is actually a pretty good picture! Not so much bus-stop-condam-in-ear and more so, scary crawler from "The Descent"

And we all know how that movie actually scared me!

Now the stupid judges didn't like this one, but we all know they're morons - I really think she did a great job at "being scary but not losing her model" She's still pretty and this photo could sell.


Hello America's Next Top Model - I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE THIS PICTURE SOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH.

The way this picture feels so uncomfortable, so raw, so harsh!

Her mouth looks like it's just opening up for something to eat - like your soul!

I heart CariDee!!!!




So whose left in the final three??

Well let's see!

There's perfection, also known as CariDee also known as MY FIRST CHOICE PICK!!

Kicking yourself in the ass now, aren't you Robyn?!

Drag Queen my ass Nigel "I'm a pussy that can't take a GREAT joke" Barker, I hope when CariDee wins she slaps you in the ass and grinds up and down on you where leather chaps!

Oh man, when CariDee wins that'll be two winners in a row for Darek - the closest I've come to winning things in a long long time!






I MEAN COME ON! LOOK AT THIS PERFECTION! She's been in the bottom two for the last two weeks and why? To throw us off.

That's the smartest they can be. The ONLY thing that's stopping me from collecting on me bet now is if the judges just pick Eugena (she's the only one left that's 18) for the age factor. But 20 years old is not too bad of a number.

P.S. This was also a faboulous pic of Amanda, I was surprised!



WHOSE THIS?! Eugena AKA my second pick?! Oh Robyn, this must utterly blow for you!

You have to admit though - best picture out of all the bull fighting pictures, but not hard to say that, with CariDee's eyes closed, Melrose looking like the mother of the female lead from The Corpse Bride, and the twins and their awkward (too awkward) poses.

But all in all, brava girl! Now let's just some ProActiv on you and you're set!

And whose last in the final three? Melrose. And damnit, why is she such a good model? Thank god you're 23 - you're the Jade of the group and it's wonderful!

But wait...where are Robyn's picks?

Oh...

...

..

.

They're not here anymore; they're all gone.

I'm telling you Robyn - age is everything!!!

18-20 MAX, I don't think there has been a winner older than 20 in any of the seasons and we all know the first season doesn't count!

I know I sound smug but I'm on such a high right now, my exam went pretty good, I finally talked to Travis after so long of not talking to him, and I'm getting over my cold/flu.

Can't wait for that free meal Robyn :)